Scrap Paper

I write to release a caged up inner beast
to create and maintain some sorta outer peace.
Jot down some feelings so i can read later
Thanks to my pencil and piece of scrap paper.
 i feel so out, of a place i dont belong.
Wishing i could fit in, just to get along.
I grab another sheet of a to be work, Im the creator.
Done with my pencil and piece of scrap paper.
Sometimes when i express but cant seem to address
Ill crumble these lines up, there unimportant and a mess
trying to stress, HI-Lite and confess
composing a point so it comes out the best
Throw the whole thing away, so i dont feel like a faker.
Use me then lose me just like a piece of scrap paper...

Get Your Lif

Go, Go. Going gone
Going, growing, getting strong
Going getting on along.
Grasping hope forget whats wrong.
Knowing now how I easily allow
systems down caught in a cloud.
picture perfect path to pick
Obstacles, options, conflicts run thick.
Get in where you fit in, in the beginning.
Stay until your head starts spinning.
What was weak is make better
What was old is renewed
Cut the bad out with a knife
Get it going on
Get your LIFE!

Sun Moon I =Beautiful

I wonder am i beautiful to them.
Am I as large to they, as they are to me.
Can they understand your importance to they,
As you understand their importance to thee.
Please enjoy the sun and moon, would they appreciate you for that
Would man/women agree with you on their nature.
Aren't all humans alike yet different
Aren't all species from a different yet the same place.
We can find, our existence stems from natures beauty.
We all have everything in common.
One must wonder if the sun and moon LOVE US!
Because man Hates and you my friend are Fire and Ice
That makes you cool.
A beautiful creation a great person
Find and Maintain balance as the sun and moon

Untitled

For those who think they got me,
held me down
while i teared up
more or less melancholy.
For those who made my smiles
so Frequent,
then used them as ways
to disguise Inconsiderate treatment.
Once more,
to those who take blame
for my bereavement
whom which
cant tell
fiction from truth
nor recognize unleashed emotions
from concealment.
To those of you,
to whom i refer,
know who u are
but won't concur
bc hate
has you broken
left silent
still outspoken
leaves you pleased
for a sec,
a quick remedy,
but on the return
you burned a bridge
gained an enemy.
when you thought that i
would not remember
i was there to recall them
return them to sender.
if you all believe
that you got away
without any trouble
complications
or dismay.
Will have to live
that life that you chose
everyday
and lost a friend
like no other
but still ill keep u
in mind as i pray.
I shall call this prayer
untitled
due to its
lack of the truth or reasonings
of the malpractice
you compiled .
Ill ask for your forgiveness
as i forgave .
So you can move forward
without regrets
or restrictions
resulting in a little boy
growing up as a man
not a man growing up
with a little boys traditions. 
ill remember ur verse
how it was precise
and rehearsed
ill laugh
because your entitled self
has no title.
left untitled
and utterly alone
and mislead
I kneel down
i cross my hands
speak your name
bow my head.

eutopoia

a heavenly place not even our wildest dreams could replace.  An unforseen life that will relinquish the feeling of pain, the one that lets us know we're alive.  Some of us walk around with our heads held up high, some keep them real low eyes blood shot, from a day barley survived. Nobody would intrude or try to un do the sweet interlude to your dreams coming true. a perfect place where even in sorrow we find sweet grace. Its a magic place a spiritual place the moment you leave it leaves all malfunctions erased to bad i dont deserve it bc of this life ive replaced with over indulgence and over disruptenc menevolence and disgrace why bother to improve become accepted approved what a poor attitude i guess im just unweaved and unwound left cold sinking down next time im in hell ill explain how eutopia wasnt found!

The Story

what if I died when i was needed the most
 ...or if i won the big lottery but died alone sad and broke
 ...What if i spoke with a message to send
 but was only ignored becasue i wasnt a certain size color or trend
..would you feel shame pain or detained
from being jealous of what
u would never obtain.
Could you be sincere persever
when you realize what was there then gone
left in tears.
Would it matter
could it break you down
has it turned you around
did it turn your red and yellow ora into a lovely shit colored brown
no frown
wondering the town
resilance to deflect a code red
systems down.
Its there one second in time
something changes
we speak our mind
it disappears with a moment
of feeling rushed pushed unspoken.
It was never broken
but faded with shade
jaded re created to feel lost intimidated
I cant walk on water
i wont attempt it or try
i cant love you like i want to
because im failing to fall into your eyes
why stay deprived
thats the ending of our story
never started
never tried...

huh?

huh?!?

im inconplete i wont mend i wont come together i cant allow any more damage to be done bc i wont survive only whether. i was thrown off the highest cliff ever didnt float down like a feather hit the the ground just felt dead there! its not a feeling i underdand its not a pain i can make sense of its only myentire reasin to smile and it left me shattered with all inventory of a fairytail story to be used in the making of a horror movie something gory!  im recked waseted vexed fro,\m desruction so abrasive call it a tragic love tail i call the day my heart ran away bc it was it was ashamed it had failed. why cant the peices seem to find a way to fix there current  spot stated if the state they were in was the very first place they were created umm  cant i once be elated that i found a diamoned the hard way instead it was jaded i kept it anyway but it resented the fact that it was tarnished n chiped so it blew me up sunk my battle ship i get hurt bc i needed to feel needed im eager to reuse the deleted im ignorant bc i believed it wouldnt butter me up just to write its final page and not read it. so im destruction made up of thethings that made me jeer its only my favorite candy wrapper and water baloon filled up by my tears sadder then charlie brown draging his dogs leash n collor off a freeway intersection at rush hour or thmisuse of 3 words that have power or ur last bowl of good cereal pored into mik that went sour my soul is devoured fucked up i want to sleep np\ow and  never wake up